Fun weekend: Go to New York. Set up podium on street corner. Talk about things. See if you can start your own religion.
Fun weekend: Cover self in butter. Visit Red Lobster. See if people will dip things in you.
Fun weekend: Steal someone’s phone. Prank call White House (202-456-1414). See if you can get a SWAT team to show up at their place.
Fun weekend: But some sticky notes from the store. Try to lick all the stick off. Return un-sticky notes to shelf.
Fun weekend: Wait until your relatives are gone for the weekend. Fill their house with squirrels. See if they’ll believe you were just trying to re-create Snow White and the Seven Dwarves.
Fun weekend: Put the following words into a hat: accordian, elephant, DeLorean, chair, Pepsi, snot-tossing. Pick out three. See if you can raise money by pitching a movie based on those words.
Fun weekend: Get a nice suit. Brush up on some political buzzwords. Go to bar. Try to convince people you’re an ex-President.
Fun weekend: Get a pizza box. Offer people pizza. When they open the box: stuffed panda!
Fun weekend: If you’re a guy: try to convince your parents you’re pregnant. If you’re a girl: that you got someone else pregnant. If they question, yell “You just don’t understand! We’re in love!“
Fun weekend: Get together a frying pan and a package of bacon. Offer people tacos. When they look confused, cry.
Fun weekend: Name a comet after yourself. Can’t find a comet? Throw confetti in the air and try to convince people they’re falling stars.
Fun weekend: Try to teach a parrot nice words. It’ll confuse people.
